Hate Vista? Love Windows XP? Well enjoy it while you can, because good ol’ Micro$oft is doing what it does best, using strongarm tactics to bully customers, this time by killing XP. The software giant has announced that it XP will be going off the market on June 30 this year. Software updates will stop on April 14, 2009 and support ends on April 14, 2014. And despite the efforts of thousands of petition signing fans, this date is set in stone. To be fair to Microsoft, that was the original date set in the Windows Life-Cycle Policy, but I think that they’re publicizing it to spook people into buying Vista, an operating system that has been called a “work in progress” by Micro$oft CEO Steve Ballmer.
I proudly use XP myself. I’m all for software upgrades, as I can’t stand using anything but the latest and greatest technology. But I’m not gonna spend my hard earned cash on an incomplete OS, only to have the completed version released two years later. I think as a consumer, I deserve more than that. The only people I know that are comfortable with Vista are those with average computing needs, the computer illiterate or those willing to spend tons on money on equipment upgrades. But I’ll stop myself before I got on an anti-Vista rant. In the meantime, I’ll save my pennies for Windows 7. XP fans, buy your copies while you still can.
I was just websurfing, and I found an article so interesting I had to share with you. It features a list of obsolete tech skills, and I found it quite amusing. The full list is on ObsoleteSkills.com. It reminded me of my childhood in fact. Most I agree with, a few I don’t. See how many you relate to.
Changing the ribbon on a typewriter
Rewinding audio or video cassettes
Adjusting the rabbit ears on your TV set
Checking your beeper
Formatting a floppy disk
Having to put www in front of every URL
Loading film into a camera
Using a darkroom
Licking stamps
Paying with a check
Using a pay phone
Looking up a business in the Yellow Pages
Switching from TV to Game Mode on the box behind the TV
Blowing into a dusty Nintendo cartridge to make it work
Using the Dewey Decimal System to find a book
Winding your watch
Long division (other than for school)
Calling the radio station to find out what song that was
Ripping the trim with the holes off the sides of computer paper
Calling someone collect
Replacing tape in your answering machine
Threading a filmstrip
Popping popcorn with hot oil
Heating a “TV Dinner” in the oven
Getting up to manually change the channel
Repairing a television set
Sharpening a razor blade
Adding water to car batteries
Riding a single-speed bike
Setting the time on a VCR
Downloading music from the original Napster
Putting tape over the punched-out holes on a VCR tape so you can use it again
Using correction fluid
Putting a nickel on the tone arm of a record player to keep it from skipping
Placing the needle at the beginning of a song on a vinyl record without making a scratching noise
Popping in a flash cube
Using a choke
Cleaning a vinyl record
Defrosting the refrigerator
Refilling a fountain pen
Using carbon paper to make copies
Changing tracks on an 8-track tape
Taping songs off the radio onto a cassette tape
Sniffing freshly mimeographed tests
Sending a handwritten letter
Writing in cursive
Mowing the yard with a non-powered push mower (May be coming back, though …)
Milk deliveries
Manually entering prices into an old-fashioned cash register
I was gonna post this last night, but I got hit with some serious spyware. But it was no match for the combined forces of Spybot - Search and Destroy and Trojan Remover. Not a sponsored post by the way. Just giving some good products their props.
I’ve been watching Microsoft and Yahoo’s dealings after the merger was proposed, wondering what the outcome would be and what impact it would have on my life. At $44.6 billion, it seemed like they would take the bait. Seemed like a damn good figure to me. But apparently I was wrong, as Yahoo! has rejected the bid, reason being that the offer “substantially undervalues” one of the Internet’s most prized franchises. Well, I’m just a po’ black man. I won’t question the wisdom of the people who’re (who are!) used to that kind of dough.
Yahoo! is obviously playing hard-to-get. It knows it has Micro$oft by the balls, knowing that it’s their only hope of taking down Google. You can tell by their language. “The board of directors is continually evaluating all of its strategic options in the context of the rapidly evolving industry environment and we remain committed to pursuing initiatives that maximize value for all stockholders.” Translation (for those who don’t speak corporate): “We’re looking at our options, and we’ll take the best deal.”
I don’t blame Yahoo! I mean I’m no corporate bigshot, but I know when negotiating, the first offer is rarely the best. Micro$oft called the decision “unfortunate”, but just like a drunk frat boy alone with a coy cheerleader, it will not be denied (big surprise). That’s to be expected. They wouldn’t get where they were if they didn’t play rough. Micro$oft may have its way however, as a clause in Yahoo’s bylaws once thought to protect against hostile takeovers, may be nullified by replacing Yahoo’s 10 directors. Yahoo! isn’t safe yet, but for now, Google can breathe a sign of relief.
By now I’m sure you’ve heard of Microsoft latest potential acquisition. Microsoft is shelling out $44.6 billion to buy Yahoo! I wasn’t too surprised when I heard of this. Microsoft’s failure to jump on the search bandwagon back when they had the chance has always been one of their greatest failures. They envy Google. Always have. And with good reason. The Internet has a lot a room left for growth, but the number of people using computers is pretty much tapped out (buying software for them anyway).
Microsoft’s share price is around $28. Google’s share price is around $500, and climbing. Google is experiencing the kinda of growth Microsoft saw back in its heyday. Now competition from open source is making M$ look to other avenues than software for profits. They say they “admire” Google but nothing would make them happier than crushing them. This has Google wetting themselves, drawing the antitrust card and highlighting Micro$oft’s record of trying to create proprietary monopolies.
Already I’ve heard of people who are swearing to give up Yahoo! if they merge with Micro$oft, afraid they’ll bring their unique brand of f****ry with them. So what’s Yahoo! up to? Well, they’re playing hard to get. But Yahoo! employees aren’t too enthusiastic. One Yahoo! engineer even said, “this is the frosting on a giant double-layer suck cake.” Since I can’t get a piece of the billion dollar pie, I’m gonna have fun with this potential merger. Here are some names I’ve thought up for the new search giant:
Microhoo
Yahsoft
M!crosoft
Mycrosoft
Miyahasooft!
…and my favourite…FATAL EXCEPTION #blahblahblah
Here are some new attributes of the new search giant I’ve thought up:
You get a 404 when you try to access Google in Internet Explorer.
You’ll have to buy a license to access the new Yahoo!, which you’ll have to renew every year, and it will come in Home, Media Center, Professional and Ultimate.
You won’t be able to access the new Yahoo! in Firefox or any browser besides IE.
You’ll occasionally get the blue screen of death.
Microsoft will monitor all your private conversations in your Microhoo messenger client. I mean you’ll “participate” in their Customer Experience Improvement Program (without your knowledge).
You’ll have an annoying blue E teaching you how to use the Internet, and it will simply refuse to go away.
We all know that Vista was a failure of an OS. Now before you M$ fanboys gang up on me, consider this. Which operating system in the history of computing actually encouraged users to “downgrade?” Even Bill Gates himself admitted that Vista could’ve used a bit more polish. Vista could’ve been something great, but Microsoft rushed its release to meet its shipping date. Seems like the Longhorn project was a bit too ambitious for the folks at Redmond to handle. And yes, I can afford Vista. I just don’t want to. But the ultimate proof that Vista was a flop is the fact that Vista’s successor is already in the works. Seems like they’ve learned that people, though still very stupid, have gotten smart enough to realize that a turd wrapped in a fancy package is still a turd. Dubbed Windows 7, it is scheduled to be released as early as 2009. Here’s a short video of its interface. It’s a bit blurry, but clear enough.
Impressive no? I’d like to say that that’s an OS I’d actually buy, but if it has the same driver and hardware issues as Vista, then I’ll continue to roll with XP. But as complacent as Micro$oft is, they’re not stupid, and I’m 99.9% sure that they’ll fix all of Vista’s flaws. Worse with competition from open source software and online services like Google. This should be what Vista was originally meant to be. I’m looking forward to it, but don’t take my timeline as gospel, as Microsoft’s predictions cannot be trusted. So those who spent their hard earned money on Vista, all I have to say is “Ha Ha!” I almost feel sorry for you suckers though. You spent good money on an OS with the shortest product cycle since Windows ME. At least Vista succeeded in doing one thing. It helped Bill retire a little more comfortably.
Apple is known for their ultra sexy products. One only has to look at the iPod and the iPhone. Well now Apple has released another revolutionary product: the MacBook Air, the world’s thinnest laptop. So thin that it can fit in a manila envelope. It has a full size keyboard, a LED-backlit 13.3 inch display and a larger trackpad. Needless to say, it had my mouth watering! It’s so insanely sexy that even a pathological liar couldn’t deny its sex appeal.
Bit of a problem though. I don’t think a laptop that thin is very durable. It looks like you’d dent it if you type too hard. So if you’re accident prone, you’d better think twice about buying this. It has one USB port, no external battery, no CD/DVD drive and no Firewire port. Ok fine. Obviously some sacrifices had to be made to make it thin. No problem. But wait. It costs US$1799, US$500 more than a MacBook Pro, which has all the above features. Lemme get this straight. You get less yet pay more? Yet it somehow feels like a bargain. Behold the power of the reality distortion field!
What can US$2500 get you? Well now you can add a car to that list, as Indian automaker Tata *snicker* has designed “the world’s cheapest car” for just that price. For a car that cheap, it doesn’t look too bad. I expected it to look like a shoebox on wheels. Here are the specs:
No air conditioning, no airbags, no power steering, no passenger side mirror, one windscreen wiper, rear mounted engine, 10′ x 5′ with seating for four, 33bhp, 50 miles to the gallon, 0-70 in 14 seconds with a max. speed of 65 mph.
Not the most impressive vehicle on the road by any means. And here’s the clincher. It is held together with plastic and glue. No welding. Makes you wanna take a nice Sunday drive with your lovely wife and two adorable children right? I bet a plastic cup has a higher crash safety rating. Plus I know this thing is gonna pollute the atmosphere like a smokestack. But Tata needn’t worry. India’s being used as an outsourcing haven, so I’m pretty sure that American businesses over there don’t comply with any environmental standards. Still, it is designed for 3rd world nations such as India, whose people can’t afford a typical car. In fact, it has been dubbed “The People’s Car”.
I applaud Tata for this. Designing a decent vehicle with the people’s pockets in mind. Just don’t try to use it as a chickmobile. You’re not gonna get any action driving the world’s cheapest car by any means. In fact, the exact opposite will happen. So it’s a safe bet that it won’t be much of a hit over here in the West. We’re too class conscious. And speaking of class consciousness, Tata is set to take over Jaguar and Land Rover. So Tata may grow into a respectable car brand after all. Looks like India’s got more going for it than just tech support call centres. The Tata Nano may be the world’s cheapest car, but it’s not the world’s cheapest ride. That title belongs to Paris Hilton *rimshot*.
Well folks, the day has finally come. Bill Gates has finally left Microsoft. I posted on this a while back, and it has finally happened. He will leave the company to focus on charity work. He made his last appearance at CES 2008. In front of legions of geeks, he did the usual. Heralding the future of tech and shamelessly plugging all things Microsoft, including the Zune 2, the Surface, the XBOX 360 and Windows Mobile. But that’s not what everyone’s talking about. The buzz on the Net is over the video he presented during his keynote speech, showing him preparing for life after M$. Not interested? Ok, here’s a spoiler. The man RAPS! No joke!
After watching that video, I can’t see how you can not like the guy. The Bill Gates in that video is a far cry from the tech tyrant we used to know and fear. He seems comfortable with his nerdiness, and obviously isn’t afraid to poke fun at himself, which would soften the heart of even the harshest Microsoft critic. Just goes to show you that being successful doesn’t mean you have to be an arrogant ass. Well, what can I say about Bill. Though most the products his company releases aren’t as innovative as they’re made out to be, I have to give him props for his keen entrepreneurial skills. For a pasty white nerd, he knows the art of the hustle better than anyone from the ghetto. The man can sell you a turd and convince you that it’s a diamond. And it shows. His software isn’t the best out there, as evidenced by Vista. Yet Microsoft’s lock on the market is virtually unbreakable.
He took down IBM, the Microsoft of its age, and climbed to the top, creating an enviable financial empire that generates more money per annum than most small countries. I also have to give him credit for helping to make computers available to the masses. E-Commerce and the Internet on a whole wouldn’t be such as success if it weren’t for him. I also respect him for his philanthropy and his humility, all of which are lacking in many a CEO. But don’t count him out just yet. He will still remain as chairman. But as for day-to-day activities, that’s done for. Goodbye Bill. And since you’re being so charitable, could you lend me a million dollars? I’ll pay you back next week.
As you should all know, I’m a big Firefox fan. I’m grateful to the Mozilla Foundation for removing me from the Microsoft Matrix by pulling my head out of Bill Gates’ ass. Now I spread the gospel of Firefox wherever I go, especially on campus, where the students are surprisingly lacking in tech savvy. I’m even using it right now. So I have been eagerly awaiting the release of Firefox 3, which should be released in early 2008.
I was impressed with Firefox 2, so I can’t wait to see how much better Firefox can become. Although I haven’t gotten my hands on Gran Paradiso (the codename for the beta), I have gotten information from reliable sources about the improvements and new features. It promises to have improves security features (as if it wasn’t secure enough), greater ease of use, even more personalization, improved graphics and font rendering and improved performance.
But let’s talk about the part we really care about: the speed. Beta 2 is more streamlined and uses less memory than Firefox 2. And it moves noticeably faster than Internet Explorer 7. Finally! I can point and laugh at IE users again! Another feature that I like is the download manager, which resembles that of a BitTorrent client, which I really like. Bookmarks are now called “Places,” and there’s a star in the Location Bar near the go arrow, which I’m assuming allows you to automatically bookmark the present site. Interested? Wikipedia’s got a beautiful screenshot of it. Though cosmetically it greatly resembles Firefox 2, it’s not like that’s a bad thing, as Firefox looks great as it is. While posting this, I dug around the Mozilla website deep enough to get my hands on Pre-Beta 3. Looks like Mozilla gave me an early Christmas present.
So you just upgraded to Vista huh? You feel up-to-date on the latest technological trends. Sure you’ve had to sacrifice some processing speed and the OS treats you like a retard by asking you confirm even the simplest request. But the shiny new interface makes it all worth it. Plus you don’t really mind. You don’t do any hardcore stuff like graphic design, video editing or gaming. In fact, Word, Solitaire and Media Player are pretty much the only programs you use. Well, get ready to kick yourself in the junk.
XP Service Pack 3 is scheduled to come out in 2008, and it’s supposed to *drumroll*, make XP run 10% faster than SP2! That’s right! A free 10% boost, and considering that XP already runs 50%-100% faster than Vista, Vista users may already be regretting their purchase. But knowing Micro$oft, this may be the “Final Solution” to blow all pirated XPs out of the water. My thoughts? I direct your attention to the image in the top right hand corner. I once considered using Vista, even though it’s a complete imitation of Mac OS X. I fell in love with the slick interface above all. I coveted it so much that I used the Vista Transformation Pack to make my system look more Vista-like.
But on second thought, I realized that Vista was like the typical hot chick. Fine as hell, but with little real substance. And news of this convinced me that I made the right choice. Windows XP Service Pack 3 is set to come out the first half of next year. Vista SP1 is due around the same time, but it barely improves the system’s performance. Another reason why when it comes to software, especially from Micro$oft, it’s best to exercise common sense before, literally, buying into the hype.
Hate Vista? Love Windows XP? Well enjoy it while you can, because good ol’ Micro$oft is doing what it does best, using strongarm tactics to bully customers, this time by killing XP. The software giant has announced that it XP will be going off the market on June 30 this year. Software updates will stop on April 14, 2009 and support ends on April 14, 2014. And despite the efforts of thousands of petition signing fans, this date is set in stone. To be fair to Microsoft, that was the original date set in the Windows Life-Cycle Policy, but I think that they’re publicizing it to spook people into buying Vista, an operating system that has been called a “work in progress” by Micro$oft CEO Steve Ballmer. 
