My thoughts on…the recent spate of kidnappings in Jamaica
November 13th 2008 -
There have been a number of mysterious kidnappings in the past few weeks, and everyone is stumped as to the cause. The kidnappers first targeted young girls, but then they included men. Victims have been either raped or murdered. These kidnapping attempting have hit uncomfortably close to home, as there have been kidnapping attempts at UWI and a classmate of mine, who was almost kidnapped (or so they claim).
Needless to say, the island is gripped with fear. People are afraid to stay out late at night, or to even walk alone. Some have taken advantage of this, as a 12 year old girl who was afraid of going home late lied to her parents, telling them she escaped a kidnapping attempt. And at UTech, it was believed that a rumour of kidnapping was spread to cancel a test. The police are woefully clueless as to who the culprits are, using poster boy Mark Shields to hide their inadequacy, by assuring the public that the matter is under investigation. How many times have we heard that one? How about announcing that the matter has been solved for once? How hard can it be to police an island with only 2.7 million people?! Anyways, dissatisfied with the “progress” of our nation’s “finest”, I’ve decided to take the case, and my investigations have uncovered two suspects, Pedobear and Satan.
Pedobear: Those to frequent message boards should know of our first suspect. For those who don’t, don’t let his innocent appearance fool you. This creature is the embodiment of paedophilia. It is believed that Pedobear began targeting Jamaica after anticipating a bleak Halloween, as the poor state of the American economy would result in less candy and costumes, hence less kids coming out to play. Not to mention the closing of the Neverland Ranch, which he co-owned with Michael Jackson. It is also believed that he and his cronies, affectionately called the Pedopals, began abducting children by promising fee rides and candy, his usual modus operandi.
Satan: Sensing his term as Vice-President of the Bush Administration would soon be over, Satan decided to amuse himself by causing some more trouble in Jamaica. Religious leaders claim that some Satanic cult is behind all this. They say that the intent of the cult is to sacrifice 999 virgins before the beginning of 2009, as it is the year of the occult. I got an email about this. Geez, isn’t his ego big enough? Then again, he always had an inferiority complex. God always pwns him after all.
So who do I think it is? I don’t think it’s Satan. I don’t really believe the whole cult thing, as when people are desperate to make sense of things they can’t explain, they come up with the craziest things, just as people of old came up with mythology to explain things beyond their understanding. Need more proof? People have been accusing Haitians of being responsible for this, as Haiti is known for their involvement in voodoo. Xenophobia much? And in that email, it seemed as if those religious leaders were using the events to frighten people into church, which I believe is the wrong approach.
I’m more likely to believe that its Pedobear, but I find it strange that teenage girls were abducted, as Pedobear doesn’t particularly like anything over 12. Maybe he did that to throw people off his trail. You may consider me cold to make light of such events, but it’s how I deal with it. To tell you the truth, I’m a bit scared myself. All I can do is whisper a prayer before I leave every morning, stay alert, and hope for the best.
Related Posts:
- My thoughts on…the recent Champs war
- My thoughts on…the rash of police killings in Jamaica
- My thoughts on…Jamaica joining the CSM
- My thoughts on…the malaria outbreak in Jamaica
- My thoughts on…the recent oil crisis
kami Says:
November 14th, 2008 at 10:59 am
Scary times Leon..My aunt was recently held at gunpoint in JA and robbed of her laptop,phone and other personals. I am thanful she eascaped unscathed-physically i.e but I will be worrying until 2010 when her course of study is over.
Stunner Says:
November 16th, 2008 at 10:27 pm
LOL, Pedobear!
This upsurge in kidnappings or alleged kidnappings is very scary and serious. The crime rate in Jamaica is just escalating and all the police can do is talk.
Stunners last blog post..KRW: Guilt Trip
crankyputz Says:
November 17th, 2008 at 3:09 pm
Interesting take.
I was driving down the street last night and I imagined someone coming up with a guy, trying to rob us…we in Canada take our safety for granted….its my wish that everyone oculd be so lucky…
crankyputzs last blog post..How to Sweat a Recession…
Shen Says:
December 2nd, 2008 at 10:36 pm
This sounds frightening indeed! I can’t believe I didn’t hear about this until last week though when a friend of mine casually mentioned that her mom wanted her to move back home because of kidnappings. I thought she was talking about regular, once in a year, kidnappings!’ I certainly didn’t imagine anything of this magnitude!
Now I’m scared to come home for Christmas..