Categories: Ramblings

You’ve probably heard the crap being tossed around the place that Jesus’ bones were found in some tomb, and that the bones of his alleged son were found. Sure we’ve heard this all before. The DaVinci Code made sure of that. And for the uninformed, these claims were made way before that. But the issue has arisen again because the discovery was made by James Cameron, because we all know that being an acclaimed director automatically makes you a qualified archaeologist. The great Mr. Cameron claims that Jesus Christ of Nazareth never ascended, and never died for that matter. He just fainted on the cross, woke up, lived for a couple years, fathered a brat named Judah with Mary Magdalene, and then kicked the bucket. This ticked me off to no end, but after a while, I laughed it off, realizing the idiocy of his claims. #1. These so called DNA remains. Who were they compared with? Does anyone alive have a proved sample of Jesus’ DNA, or did he just come down from heaven and offer one so that his divinity could be disproved? #2. Roman officials confirmed his death. His body was examined and everything, unless you’re too arrogant to believe that back then they could have properly identified a dead body. #3. The names on the graves were far too common to base such a grave claim.

Cameron’s just trying to revive his career by taking advantage of the commercial interest in Jesus triggered by The Passion and trying to create some lame ass DaVinci Code knockoff. When questioned, James said he didn’t mean to offend, he just to wanted to “stretch the imagination” and had a “great passion for a good detective story.” A little advice James, the next time you wanna play Sherlock Holmes, do what the rest of us do: watch CSI and try to tag the perp before show’s end, instead of messing with the faith of millions, ok? I’m happiest of all for Jesus, ’cause 2,000+ years of child support is something no man wants to face. Imagine Jesus on The Maury Show, with some hoochie mama yelling at him to “take responsibility and be a man,” while he sits silently and patiently, waiting for the famous yellow envelope containing the paternity results. Now that’s a show I’d watch!